Anyway, the thing: For a long while, the big chain store Hobby Lobby has had these weekly 40% off coupons on their website. Well, art supplies can be damn expensive, so I would go to the trouble to print these things out. And to make it extra absurd, since I am blessedly free of Internet service, I have to go to a library to print them out. For 15 cents-- that's usually the going rate for a black & white print.
Of course, cashiers are a merciless breed, and she pooh-poohed my request.
But what difference can it possibly make to you, or your employer, that I waste my time and money, and the world's ink and paper resources, jumping through this hoop? There's no value to you in the Coupon Production Process (CPP), in itself. No possible benefit to Hobby Lobby or its shareholders, in having legions of craft consumers bent sheepishly over their inkjet printers, cartridges whirring back and forth in dogged pursuit of less pricey pencils.
"But... I've been here in the past, and.."
Here's the thing-- the owner guy was standing there. Him plus the cashier. So I think the cashier was constrained from his usual casual ways. The owner says, "We can do 30%. That's the best we can do."
So I started thinking aloud, sort of figuring out the logic of it, "So if I went and printed out a coupon.. then I could get 40% off... I mean I guess I can do this another time..."
I actually didn't mean to take it nuclear like that. Threaten to not buy the stuff at all. But that got them moving, and the cashier tactfully said, "Oh, somebody forgot to give you one of these," and found a coupon somewhere behind the counter. So that got things squared away on protocol I guess. The owner was fine with it, but at the same time very intense about the whole process. I just wish it could have been Larry David in my place, and that I could've watched him make some big speech about it all, and then play that great scene transition music before we see him talking about it with Sherry or his agent pal. That's what I need in the way of coupons, would be Larry David Request Coupons.
I'll even shell out 15 cents at the library if he insists.